A simple plea...

Faithful readers, a friend of mine is considering purchasing this bike:




If you look closely, you will notice it doesn't have a chain! Yes, this is a shaft driven bike from a company called Dynamic Bicyles, Inc. The conundrum is we can't find anyone to talk to who has had any first hand experience with the bike. Their testimonials are glowing, the video news clip touts its praises, but this is all stuff found on their website (where they aren't going to put the negative). We are looking for independent reviews, pro and con. Also, if after checking out their website you have comments let me know.

As a thank you, I present you with Annie, one of the SBB Girls.

A post so good...

It is worthy of a full repeat! From my brother over at his blog. I am curious -- can any of you tell we are related? This is from July 21, 2006:

Hey A$$HOLE!

********CAUTION:The following will contain some colorful language, to say the least.*********

You have been warned.


To the driver of the Redfire 2005 Mustang, CA License Plate Number 5LPC822:

On every car I have ever driven, from California to Texas to Europe and even Saudi Arabia, there is a lever on the left hand side of the steering wheel. It is used to indicate to other drivers that you intend to change lanes. To indicate you want to turn left, you pull down on the lever and a set of lights will flash in the front and rear left side. To indicate right, you push slightly up and the same lights on the right side will flash. These are called, coincidentally, "Blinkers". Now, some automobiles will have these lights on the ends of their side-view mirrors. Pretty cool.

I am pretty sure that, even in the admittedly beautiful piece of machinery that you own, there is one.

Even in the advanced technological age we live in, there is not a tool out there THAT CAN FUCKING TELL ME TELEPATHICALLY YOU WANT TO CHANGE LANES. YOU HAVE TO MOVE YOUR HAND TO THAT SMALL LEVER AND LET ME KNOW.

While we are at it, cheesedick, if you do desire to change lanes, at least give me some room to adjust instead of come within 2 feet of my truck while moving at 65 Miles per Hour.

So, to recap, assface, these are the steps:

1. Look over the shoulder of the lane in which you want to enter. That means turn your scrawny neck around and make sure you have enough room..

2. Use the lever and push or pull in the direction you want to go.

3. Safely make your lane change.

I have your car and plate memorized. I saw you yell at me through your window, acting indignant as if you did nothing wrong and then get bent out of shape when I flashed my lights at you. If you drive in a safe manner, people wouldn't have to let you know you almost hit them.

Happy trails, asshole.

P.S. -- Remember asshole, I didn't write this so don't be coming after me. I just happen to agree with my brother... you are a cheesedick.

Another case of "What the..."

The California Appeals Court is going to hear arguments considering the "fairness" of the State's high school exit exam. Lawyers for students who failed the exam claim it penalizes students who don't have access to a quality education. They want these students to retroactively receive their diplomas.

Is it just me or is that plain stupid? Let me get this straight... your kid can't pass the high school exit exam so you would like me to go ahead and give him a diploma anyway? On what basis... his attendance? The exam is unfair to those who don't have access to a quality education... hmm... so we make the test easier? To the students who worked hard, diligently studied and passed the exam -- job well done... but it wasn't really necessary. That diploma you got... we're just gonna print a bunch more and give them to anyone who attended school at all.

What kind of sophomoric intelligence is this? Dammit, if the kid fails the exam sit his butt down in a chair and teach him what he needs to know so he CAN pass it. The whole reason behind the exam was to help ensure we weren't letting kids slip thru the system without an education, and the first year the test becomes a requirement, those that fail bitch and moan. I am sorry. I know I wasn't the best student in high school (my apologies to my parents and teachers whose efforts were in vain), but if I had flunked out of school it would have been MY fault. I didn't make the cut, so I would've had to go to summer school, re-take my senior year over again, or pass the GED exam. And by the way the exam, which tests students in English and math, can be taken six times beginning in the sophomore year. It only requires students to demonstrate a 10th grade aptitude in English and an 8th grade aptitude in mathematics. In other words, for students who fail the exam, there had to have been plenty of opportunity to realize areas of concern and work to overcome them over THREE YEARS of school!

If on the off chance a ruling comes down in favor of these students, how comfortable would you feel employing this person? Maybe his reading comprehension is substandard, but he has a diploma, so it becomes automatically assumed his scholastic aptitude is at a certain level (without anyone knowing otherwise). If he misreads a vital set of instructions on the job which places the lives of others in jeopardy, can we hold him accountable? Can we blame the hiring manager? He did his job by ensuring this person was "qualified" for the job. After all, the guy graduated with a diploma!

Over the past couple of years tire companies have been employing ad campaigns spouting "who is riding on your tires" -- using kids and family members as guilt fodder to get people to buy their product. We can use that same kind of philosophy with "Who is maintaining our roads?" "Who is building our homes?" and even "Who is wiring the electricity in your house?" If the high school diploma is devalued to accommodate those who didn't make the grade, the only responsible decision our employers would have would be tougher hiring policies to ensure they are hiring qualified personnel. This would mean -- guess what -- APTITUDE tests!

Taking this to the next step, if these kids manage to get their diplomas without having to pass the exit exam, how can we justify NOT giving degrees to students who don't meet their college major requirements? Is it really any different? Yeah, now THERE'S a doctor I want to trust with the life my child.

The bottom line here is what value to we wish to place on a High School Diploma. It is that simple. The exit exam has a 90% pass rate. Let's not discredit the efforts of that ninety percent to appease the other ten. And one more thing: Personally, I think the exit exam standards are too low. Seriously -- 10th grade English and 8th grade Math? California is 46th in the nation in Education. Can't we do a helluva' lot better than that?

WOW!

Jennifer Love Hewitt. Stunning.

Worth reading:

Obstensibly this is an "unpublished" letter by a woman whose husband felt the contents needed to be read so he sent it into the email ether. Regardless of the validity of this, I absolutely, 100% agree with its sentiments...

New Immigrants

-- From: "David LaBonte"

My wife, Rosemary, wrote a wonderful letter to the editor of the OC Register which, of course, was not printed. So, I decided to "print" it myself by sending it out on the Internet. Pass it along if you feel so inclined.

Dave LaBonte


-- Written in response to a series of letters to the editor in the Orange County Register:

Dear Editor:

So many letter writers have based their arguments on how this land is made up of immigrants. Ernie Lujan for one, suggests we should tear down the Statute of Liberty because the people now in question aren't being treated the same as those who passed through Ellis Island and other ports of entry.

Maybe we should turn to our history books and point out to people like Mr. Lujan why today's American is not willing to accept this new kind of immigrant any longer.

Back in 1900 when there was a rush from all areas of Europe to come to the United States, people had to get off a ship and stand in a long line in New York and be documented. Some would even get down on their hands and knees and kiss the ground. They made a pledge to uphold the laws and support their new country in good and bad times. They made learning English a primary rule in their new; American households and some even changed their names to blend in with their new home.

They had waved good bye to their birth place to give their children a new life and did everything in their power to help their children assimilate into one culture. Nothing was handed to them. No free lunches, no welfare, no labor laws to protect them. All they had were the skills and craftsmanship they had brought with them to trade for a future of prosperity.

Most of their children came of age when World War II broke out. My father fought along side men whose parents had come straight over from Germany, Italy, France and Japan. None of these 1st generation Americans ever gave any thought about what country their parents had come from. They were Americans fighting Hilter, Mussolini and the Emperor of Japan.

They were defending the United States of America as one people. When we liberated France, no one in those villages were looking for the French-American or the German American or the Irish American. The people of France saw only Americans. And we carried one flag that represented one country. Not one of those immigrant sons would have thought about picking up another country's flag and waving it to represent who they were. It would have been a disgrace to their parents who had sacrificed so much to be here.

These immigrants truly knew what it meant to be an American. They stirred the melting pot into one red, white and blue bowl.

And here we are in 2006 with a new kind of immigrant who wants the same rights and privileges. Only they want to achieve it by playing with a different set of rules, one that includes the entitlement card and a guarantee of being faithful to their mother country. I'm sorry, that's not what being an American is all about.

I believe that the immigrants who landed on Ellis Island in the early 1900s deserve better than that for all the toil, hard work and sacrifice in raising future generations to create a land that has become a beacon for those legally searching for a better life. I think they would be appalled that they are being used as an example by those waving foreign country flags.

And for that suggestion about taking down the Statute of Liberty, it happens to mean a lot to the citizens who are voting on the immigration bill. I wouldn't start talking about dismantling the United States just yet.

Rosemary LaBonte

Rosemary, you go get down with your bad self!

I am a bad blogger...

A whole week without a post? What the hell's wrong with me?! Sorry faithful readers. Let's get caught up...

Last Friday was the first opportunity I have had in a long time to play Poker. "Charlie 'Almost' Brown" Clark was thriving as play started. With 10 players at the table, I just wasn't getting any cards. At one point there were three misdeals in a row by the same person (not all alcohol induced) and during that the sum of all the cards I had been dealt wouldn't equal an Ace. The couple of hands I went in on didn't pan out and I was down (chip-wise) early. About 2 hours in, I got dealt the Ace of spades and the Jack of clubs. I come in for a raise (textbook), and as the bet goes around two other people raise the bet. When it gets back to me I call, then as it goes around the bet is raised... AGAIN! Now a little irked (my jack had me a little nervous) I call when the bet comes around only to have the bet RAISED AGAIN!!!! CRAP!!!! I call again, which commits about half of my chips to the pot. Bet goes around and is... guess what... RAISED!!! So now I am fiscally committed to the pot so I call "all in". Before you know it there are 5 people playing, 4 all in with 3 side pots. I am pissed, and start reaching for the backup $20 for a rebuy. But the flop comes 3 spades, one the Jack. So now I have the top pair with an Ace kicker and a Nut flush draw. The next card is a Spade and I win the hand giving me a dominant chip position the rest of the night... which I needed, because "Almost" here managed to only come in 3rd, my friend Matt's Dad being the bane of my existence at the poker table. It seemed everytime I went in, he did and had better cards than me. However I walked away with money so I can't complain. I had a lot of fun.

Last weekend was the only break I had between shows at Garbeau's so Saturday night I made good on a promise and went to see Broadway at Sierra, a musical revue at Sierra College in Rocklin. I took my niece Amanda and it was incredible! One of the most enjoyable theater experiences I have had in a long time. There are only 4 shows left (tonight at 7:30pm, tomorrow at 2pm and 7:30, Sunday at 2pm) so I HIGHLY recommend those who are able go see it. It is worth it. I will be attending tomorow's matinee. All Roger Stalkers welcome.

This week wasn't entirely memorable, other than the fact the earth didn't explode. Work has left me with a general sense of irritation (the facts of which I won't go into here as this isn't the right venue -- for now), so I pretty much ghost walked thru the week. Top that off with the fact I have to work tomorrow and I am just thrilled!

A little over a week from now I get older, so that of course means it's time for self-reflection -- taking stock of my life and where I am at versus where I should be, etc. There are things I wish were different, so I have to grade my performance right now at a "B-". Slightly above average, but lots of room for improvement. I will say that if certain aspects of my life prosper with the promise they currently hold, next year's grade could be significantly higher. I raise my glass of Diet Toxic Sludge -- "Here's to hoping!"

The temperature outside is currently 107°... yeah... now that's Africa hot! To my mother I want assure her I am drinking lots of water (yes water. Well, along with my Diet Toxic Sludge®).

I got a brainstorm the other night, and when I have a little more time my future posts are going to have an added touch -- so stay tuned for the surprise!

Here is a great picture of Krista Allen. Some of you might remember her as one of the super hot lesbians in "Anger Management", her series of Emmanuelle in Space, or dozens of other films. Can one of my linguist friends translate the text? Yes, there is text... to the right of her... no, the right. OK, close your eyes, now shift them to the right of her and open. YES!!! That text!

ANNOYED!!!!!

OK, I am not one who bashes SUVs or trucks, I believe they just aren't what I choose to drive. I enjoy my car, and it has served me faithfully for over 7 years. Likewise, I don't have anything against the drivers of said big vehicles (unlike at least one friend who believes that the owners of large trucks and SUVs are a complete waste of space), unless these people are inconsiderate!

This morning I had to run a couple of errands for work, and the last stop on my way back to the office was at a restaurant to pick up the lunch order I had phoned in. I pulled into the parking lot and there were two empty spaces next to each other. I chose the one on the right and centered my car perfectly in the slot, allowing people on either side to get in/out without problems. I run in, grab my food, and when I come out a montrosity of a pickup trick was in the stall to my left... SORT OF! The peabrained dolt who drove the truck apparently got his license from a box of cracker jacks and it was evident his sense of spatial relationships was about as dim as his IQ. It should be noted I did not see the disgusting pile of man-flesh which was driving, so the masculine "he" should be treated as an asexual pronoun -- much like the person himself.

The moron managed to allow himself plenty of room to get out of HIS truck, but the passenger side was .0015 inches from my door. I had to get into my car from the passenger side, a feat which should be noted is rather comical to watch when executed by someone of my size. I must say the more herculean feat was refraining from using my keys to sign my name in the side of his truck.

To those of you who own large vehicles, just remember the vehicle has TWO sides, and be aware of what's going on. Thank you. To the idiot who parked his white Ford pickup at the Elephant Bar on Arden Way in Sacramento around 11:45 PDT today -- You Suck, You should be eviscerated and dropped from the top of a six story building into a vat of hot fat. That is all.

I found this notice you can print copies of and keep in your car, but personally, I think it's just too nice. This one is MUCH better!

I had my camera phone and a digital camera in my car, but I was too mad to think to take a picture, but it looked something like this:

Some great quotes

Thanks Cue!

Sometimes, when I look at my children, I say to myself, "Lillian, you should have remained a virgin."
- Lillian Carter (mother of 39th president Jimmy Carter)

I had a rose named after me and I was very flattered. But I was not pleased to read the description in the catalog: "No good in a bed, but fine against a wall."
- Eleanor Roosevelt

Last week, I stated this woman was the ugliest woman I had ever seen. I have since been visited by her sister, and now wish to withdraw that statement.
- Mark Twain

The secret of a good sermon is to have a good beginning and a good ending; and to have the two as close together as possible.
- George Burns

Santa Claus has the right idea. Visit people only once a year.
- Victor Borge

Be careful about reading health books. You may die of a misprint.
- Mark Twain

What would men be without women? Scarce, sir...mighty scarce.
- Mark Twain

By all means, marry. If you get a good wife, you'll become happy; if you get a bad one, you'll become a philosopher.
- Socrates

I was married by a judge. I should have asked for a jury.
- Groucho Marx

My wife has a slight impediment in her speech. Every now and then she stops to breathe.
- Jimmy Durante

The male is a domestic animal which, if treated with firmness and kindness, can be trained to do most things.
- Jilly Cooper

I have never hated a man enough to give his diamonds back.
- Zsa Zsa Gabor

-Don't go around saying the world owes you a living. The world owes you nothing. It was here first.
- Mark Twain

-My luck is so bad that if I bought a cemetery, people would stop dying.
- Ed Furgol

-Money can't buy you happiness... but it does bring you a more pleasant form of misery.
- Spike Milligan

-What's the use of happiness? It can't buy you money.
- Henny Youngman

-I am opposed to millionaires... but it would be dangerous to offer me the position.
- Mark Twain

-Until I was thirteen, I thought my name was shut up.
- Joe Namath

-Youth would be an ideal state if it came a little later in life.
- Herbert Henry Squith

-I don't feel old. I don't feel anything until noon. Then it's time for my nap.
- Bob Hope

-I never drink water because of the disgusting things that fish do in it.
- WC. Fields

-We could certainly slow the aging process down if it had to work its way through Congress.
- Will Rogers

-Don't worry about avoiding temptation... as you grow older, it will avoid you.
- Winston Churchill

-Maybe it's true that life begins at fifty... but everything else starts to wear out, fall out, or spread out.
- Phyllis Diller

-The cardiologist's diet: If it tastes good spit it out.
- Unknown

-By the time a man is wise enough to watch his step, he's too old to go anywhere.
- Billy Crystal

Well...

the knife was unsheathed and I almost went thru with it before I realized I haven't seen Superman Returns in IMAX yet. Damn.

So blasting the image failed. Turns out if the Ghost Console is installed on the client machines, Windows 2000 Server images go kaput. So here it is Saturday, and I get to come into the office to perform the following:

1. Using a Norton Ghost disc, remove the Norton Ghost Client from 16 machines.
2. Using a Ghost boot disc, reboot the machines and prepare them to accept an image from a server.
3. Using the GhostCast server, select the image and specific NTFS partition I want to blast, then tell the server to accept clients.
4. One by one, go to each machine and tell it to receive the image from the server.
5. Start the blast.
6. Upon completion, reboot all the computers, which at this time now successfully accepted the image.
7. One by one, login and rename each computer (because without the Norton Ghost Client, they can't rename themselves after accepting an image).
8. Go home, die, then go to the theater to play drums (only 2 performances of Godspell left!).

On top of this, I am currently ill, which means I am SO much fun to be around right now.

Oh, and I am still not a millionaire. Crap.

My apologies to my non-computer savvy friends for the techno-speak, but I don't have the energy to translate it right now. Here's an aid to help you.

My heart soars as I think about the end of next week when I have to manually re-image all those machines again.... SIGH.

Sometimes my job sucks...

I know, this is not an original thought or idea, but today it's very true.

As the Technical Facilities Manager for a computer training company, one of my responsibilities is to ensure the classrooms are ready for the next teaching session. In this case, I needed to setup my large classroom for a room rental next week. The event is being sponsored by another company (a training partner), so they have a computer image (a "picture" of sorts of a computer hard drive) I need to install on the computers for the class. Being over 7GB in size, it takes one day to download from their screaming fast (read dripping with sarcasm) FTP site. The next morning, I try to install the image no less than 4 times, each time producing an error. So I call the company and they overnight me 2 DVDs containing a "fixed" image... fixed. Yeah right.

For you readers who aren't into the technical stuff, you might want to skip over the next part. However, since this did take the better part of ALL DAY, I thought it was worth spelling out.

In order to get one of my computers to accept the Ghost© image, I had to:

1. Remove the Ghost Client partition.
2. Boot with a Ghost boot disk.
3. Push the image onto the machine.
4. Reboot.

Upon reboot, the generic image had no USB drivers, so I couldn't login (mouse and keyboard). So I had to --

1. Reboot using a Windows 2000 Server boot disc and perform a "repair" in order to get the basic drivers working.
2. Disable all the Symantec services since I was unable to uninstall it without the disc.
3. Install the actual Video, NIC, and Audio drivers for this machine.
4. Repair the installation of MS Office.
5. Install Windows 2000 SP4.
6. Install IE 6.1 with the latest service pack.
7. Reboot using a Ghost boot disk.
   
8. Make a new image from the machine.
9. Using Ghost, multicast it out to the rest of the machines in the classroom.
10. Go home, die, then go to the theater to play drums (only 3 performances of Godspell left!).

As of this writing (3:45pm PDT), the image is 67% complete (uploading to the server) . If this is my last blog entry ever, you know I committed seppuku.

Has my perception changed...

or have the times? (or maybe a little of both)

When I was a kid, the 4th of July was my 2nd favorite holiday (next to Xmas of course -- people giving me things for free? HELLO!!). Now, being as I am an Air Force brat, my family's peeps were all of similar ilk, meaning I was around people who really believed in what the 4th stood for! I remember being generally just damn happy as I spent the day eating BBQ, swimming (if I was lucky), eating homemade ice cream, all capped by overprotective Mom chastising Dad for giving us sparklers while he and his friends set off the minor fireworks before the big show. I don't remember any particular 4th, but I always looked forward to it and have a pretty good memory montage worthy of a Norman Rockwell painting.

I still look forward to Independence Day and still believe in the ideals which are the basis of what it represents. I love this country and proudly served as a member of the Armed Forces. But now the day seems to revolve around getting used to the fact that the neighbors are going to be lighting fireworks for approximately 17 hours AFTER you've finished and are trying to get some sleep before work, ensuring the family dog is properly tranquilized so the fireworks don't cause a heart attack (maybe that's a California thing -- we don't have many huntin' dogs out here which are used to loud bangs); and plotting out the best route to drive home so as to avoid the approximately 3 million drunk idiots who all leave the fireworks show at the same time.

Happy Birthday America! Remember there is more to you than there is to you! (if you know who said that -- wasn't that a HYSTERICAL movie?)